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I had an epiphany a few years ago where I was out at a celebrity party and it suddenly dawned on me that I had yet to meet a celebrity who is as smart and interesting as any of my friends.
- Moby
Acceptance without proof is the fundamental characteristic of Western religion, rejection without proof is the fundamental characteristic of Western science.
- Gary Zukav
They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.
- Benjamin Franklin
There is no fate that cannot be surmounted by scorn.
- Albert Camus
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
- Noel Coward
Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them.
- Samuel Butler
Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.
- Mark Twain
Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
- Fran Lebowitz
They are ill discoverers that think there is no land, when they can see nothing but sea.
- Sir Francis Bacon
There is nothing more dreadful than imagination without taste.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Someone's boring me. I think it's me.
- Dylan Thomas
Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
- Spike Milligan
One of the first lessons a president has to learn is that every word he says weighs a ton. Calvin Coolidge
Bulls can make money and Bears can make money, but Hogs just get slaughtered. Wall Street Proverb
No man will take counsel but every man will take money; therefore
money is better than counsel. Jonathan Swift
Those are great :D
People who have time to burn usually spend it with someone who hasn't. Anonymous
You can't win all the time. There are guys out there who are better than you. Yogi Berra
People with courage and character always seem sinister to the rest.
- Hermann Hesse
Read over your compositions, and wherever you meet with a passage which you think is particularly fine, strike it out.
- Samuel Johnson
In politics, absurdity is not a handicap.
- Napoleon Bonaparte
If we learn to cooperate with the inevitable, life can be a joy to the very end.
Albert J. Ni?eth
in this cryptoquote I couldn't figure out the missing letter in the authors name so I put a question mark there.
Neith I believe ;)
thats a good one ID :)
I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect.
- George Burns
A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of.
- Jane Austen
The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
The highbrow stuff is all very nice and inspirational and all, but I like personal witticisms and criticisms. They all make comments on two people at the same time. I always liked this Churchill quite:
"He's (Clement Attlee) a modest man...with much to be modest about."
...and one of many of Churchill's devastating ripostes:
Lady Astor: "My dear Winston, if you were my husband I'd poison your gin."
Churchill: "My dear woman, if you were my wife I'd drink it."
lmao Pop!! Those are really good... Churchill has had some gems :D
Women should be obscene and not heard.
Groucho Marx
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
Groucho Marx
Don't look now, but there's one too many in this room and I think it's you.
Groucho Marx
Q: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?
A: Someone who stays up all night wondering if there is a Dog.
Groucho Marx
If you've heard this story before, don't stop me, because I'd like to hear it again.
Groucho Marx
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.
Groucho Marx
Liam
Groucho Marx probably had the best one-liners of anyone else in history. :D And he often got into very big trouble with the more risque of them in the early days of live TV....
One of my favorites from Dave Barry (a little long, but good):
“The Internet is a giant international network of intelligent, informed computer enthusiasts, by which I mean, 'people without lives.' We don’t care. We have each other.... While you are destroying your mind watching the worthless, brain-rotting drivel on TV, we on the Internet are exchanging, freely and openly, the most settings, uninhibited, intimate and, yes, shocking details about our 'CONFIG.SYS.'”